Another month has passed, and with it has come a plethora of love and joy and excitement about where the winds of my life are bringing me next. Toward the beginning of the month, I was struck down by the realization that the best years of my life lay ahead of me. And that realization has fueled my desire to continue with my year-long (and life-long) quest of living wide open. Again, I amaze myself about how much love I have to give to others. It just pours and pours and pours and pours and pours and pours and pours out of me, whether I mean it to or not- I have this bottomless well of love to give. I seriously can’t put a damper on it. It’s definitely my double-edged sword. Part of my work is learning how to honor my love for others while also honoring all of the other feelings that come with the territory of putting my heart out in the world.
I’ve also had a huge resurgence in playing music. In talking with a friend about how music has shaped my life, I realized that, since I was a baby, I have not lived a day without music. I sang myself to
sleep when I was 6 months old. I tinkered around on a little piano when I was 2. I sang in my dad’s band at the age of 4. I was always in chorus and music projects and bell choir and band and piano lessons growing up. I’ve played in several bands in college and in my 20s. And, sadly, for the past 3 years or so, I have not been playing or creating music. Having music back in my life in such an intense way makes me realize how much creating music makes me walk taller, love myself more, be more risky, put myself out into the world, shine my inner sunshine, and give and receive energy from others. Singing and playing is the one thing that I could do all day and all night and never feel exhausted.
June is going to be a jam-packed awesome month. I will be gone the first two weeks on a Soul Journey in Arizona, Utah, and Colorado. Then, I’m returning to western mass to help 21 adorable kids co-create
a rock-opera during a 2-week long summer camp. And then I start teaching in the MSW program. And then I’m applying and studying for the national LICSW exam in my last (and final) level of social work licensing. Whew! Thanks to all of my friends and family who have been so supportive of me and who have given me space to live and breathe and be creative and be Snowy.
And, as always, I leave you with one of my favorite songs. The lovely and obscure and talented Devendra Banhart wrote this:
“It’s a sight to behold when you got small words to mold and you can
make ‘em your own
Still love, it would be much better. Love, it would be much better I’m told
It’s like golden corn and I love its golden glow.
It’s the little head inside your little hole and out springs some
sparkling thoughts.
Still love, it would be much better. Love, it would be much better.
Love, it would be much better. Love, it would be much better.
It’s like finding home in an old folk song, which you’ve never ever
heard, still you know every word
And, for sure, you can sing along.
But love, it would be much better. Love, it would be much better.
Love, it would be much better. Love, it would be much better. I
know. I know.”
