Queen of Carrot Flowers

“Carrots”

I think this summer is a good time to look into our blood and see where our hearts are flowing, as these flowers and vegetables will look into their hearts every day and see the sun reflecting like a great mirror their desire to live and be beautiful.

-Richard Brautigan

I’ve recently revisited my Bucket List.  Out of the 40 things listed on it, I’ve completed 17.  Not too shabby.  I’ve never actively pursued crossing items off the list.  My method has always been to nonchalantly look at the list once or twice a year and randomly cross off the items that I have completed without giving too much thought or effort to the matter.  However, I have decided that I’m going to crack-down on the list this fall and winter as a way of keeping my life as full of adventure and love as it has been this spring and summer.  Some of the items that I am focusing on include:

1. Getting my Ph.D.
Okay.  This is a super ambitious goal.  I’m looking into the Smith Social Work program… yikes! I’m also checking out what I would need to get certified in music therapy and am exploring Lesley College.  And I'm maybe looking into BC and BU programs.  Though, I wrote a snotty letter to BC after they accepted me into the MSW program and I visited their campus and was unimpressed by the White, upper-class, culturally imperialist snobbery of the program.  Whoops.  Might have shot myself in the foot on that one.

2. Write a book
Another super ambitious thing.  I’m going to focus on writing something every day for now, whether it be a blog post, a poem, general commentary on the ridiculous messiness of life, or a song lyric.

3. Raise Sea Monkeys
Seriously.  What are these little dudes made of?  Where do they come from?  What mysteries does their magical sea monkey world hold?  All of these questions have been plaguing me since I was a young child.

4. Have an old-fashioned picnic in a meadow under a large tree
Okay.  Why haven't I done this yet?  It should be super simple to pull off.  I always pictured it being under a tree like the scene in the Shawshank Redemption where Andy goes to find the tin that Red had buried for him (spoiler alert!  whoops!)

5. Take an art class
This past winter found me painting with oil pastels for the first time.  And I loved it.  And I think I might be slightly, mildly talented at it.  So I definitely want to pursue this further.

6. Read every Dr. Seuss book
The man is a genius.  His social commentary is spot-on.  Enough said.

Anyone care to help me with these?  Friends?  Lovers?  Family?



And these are some of the things on my Bucket List that I have completed:

1. Travel out west

The view from the hot air balloon.  Devil's Garden in Moab, Utah.

2. Visit the 4 Corners

This picture is self-explanatory.

3. Busk

The Shiprock and Anchordog Project

4. Fly a kite

Okay.  So you're probably wondering, "Why is she throwing a frisbee and not flying a kite?"  Well, this photo was taken at the first annual Plattsburgh Kite Flying Society... where, in fact, I did fly a kite.  But then it got too humid and rainy, so we decided to throw frisbees instead.  And I didn't get a picture of the kite flying.  But trust me, it happened.

5. Learn how to play the guitar

Check.

Also, I’m actively trying to seek out a balance between social work, music, and my artistic pursuits.  I’m thinking that, once I obtain my LICSW, I will work on opening my own private practice, where I’ll spend 3-4 days a week.  Ideally, I would love to dedicate the majority of my time to playing music, knitting, painting, and writing. However, being a full-time artist does not pay the bills… and I like being a helping professional too much to quit.

And, as always, I will leave you with one of my favorite songs by Neutral Milk Hotel.  This song has found a home in my heart and has followed me around for the past 5 years… It has transformed in meaning and often carries a hint of nostalgia laced into the words and melody.

When you were young

You were the king of carrot flowers

And how you built a tower tumbling through the trees

In holy rattlesnakes that fell all around your feet

And your mom would stick a fork right into daddy's shoulder

And dad would throw the garbage all across the floor

As we would lay and learn what each other's bodies were for

And this is the room

One afternoon I knew I could love you

And from above you how I sank into your soul

Into that secret place where no one dares to go

And your mom would drink until she was no longer speaking

And dad would dream of all the different ways to die

Each one a little more than he could dare to try